The Memories I've Lost, And Want Back
by The Elemental Alchemist Reyna
Summary: I want to remember them. We were friends." Miko, a strange and mysterious girl with a tall assistant. Join her as she struggles to remember her past while dealing with the chaotic life of being apart of the Xeno crew. Sorry,bad summary.JrxOC
1. Chapter 1

Rey: Hey peoples! If you read my other story 'Opposites Have A Lot In Common' then you already know me. If you haven't, then welcome! I'm Reyna The Elemental Alchemist and am the proud creator of Miko Komatsu!

Nobu: What about me Miss Rey!

Rey: Oh, and Nobu Yanamoko too!

Miko: Can we just start the story already? I want to shoot something.

Rey: Here. *hands Miko a life sized Gnosis card board cut out*

Miko: *eyes widen* Die gnosis! *shoots fake gnosis relentlessly*

Rey: Yeah...She hates gnosis. -_- Nobu, the disclaimer if you please.

Nobu: Miss Rey doesn't own Xenosaga or any of it's characters and plot. But she _does _own me, Miko Komatsu, any unfamiliar weapons or attacks, any events that occur that do not occur within the storyline of Xenosaga and any other OCs that appear in this story.

P.S. Sorry if someones out of character. I tried my best!

Miko Komatsu, The Mysterious Short Girl With A Tall Assistant…Wait, Mysterious? More Like Odd!

"Ma'am, where are we going again?" Nobu, my blonde headed assistant (Rey: Don't forget tall! Miko: Shut your mouth! I'm trying to tell the story from my point of view! Rey: Okay, sheesh. Pushy.), asked me, once again. "For the hundredth time, we're just patrolling the area for any enemy ships! My gosh, and I thought I was forgetful." "Sorry Ma'am. I just can't help it. I have a bad feeling again and you know how my feelings are." My assistant had a knack for being right when she had a "bad feeling" or "good feeling". And these feelings always came at the wrong times. She had already had two bad feelings and the results are 1: Me getting hit in the head with my gun when Nobu tried to reload the bullets and making me late for a meeting (which I had completely forgot about) and 2: Me hurting my foot with the door to my room when I was kicking it open. Hey, nobody told me they had fixed it so it wouldn't open if it got pushed slightly! Oh! That's right, I haven't introduced my self yet! I'm Miko Komatsu and am the proud owner of Komatsu Bing Ba Da Boom Industries. I know, the names kinda cheesy, but my friend suggested it and I wanted to honor his idea. I'm not telling you how old I am and how tall I am yet so you have to figure it out!

"Ma'am! A U-Tic ship is following us! What do you want to do? Fight? Or run? Preferably option 2 considering the ship we're in." "What do you mean `considering the ship we're in? ` Isn't this Pink Blazer? The one with the awesome pink lasers?" I asked watching the U-Tic ship on the radar. "No Ma'am. This is Pink Hana (Flower). The one with bullets that look like pink petals. You told me to get a ship good for scouting and this is the best one." I gave Nobu an annoyed look. "I said to find a good scouting ship that was quick, had a strong shield, and that had good guns or lasers! This is only two of those three and that is that its fast and has a strong shield. Oh, never mind! Just locate the nearest ship, city, or whatever! Just somewhere where we can hide or get back up from!" I told her quickly. I glanced around the room. Noticing the inside was pink and a goldish color. Where did I put the turret room at?!

"Ma'am! The closest city is The Kukai Foundation! Would you like to go there?" Nobu was being rather calm. Huh, who would've known that's how she would act in this situation? "Do we really have a choice?" I asked her with an `I know we don't, just go there! ` look. She got the hint and the ship changed its course. "Just tell them we're heading there and that we're being chased by a U-Tic ship! And that some help would be nice! Also tell them we're the friendly looking pink and silver ship." I said the last part with a grin and got up from my black leather seat. "I'm going to the turret room to slow the U-Tic ship down, okay Nobu?" Nobu simply flashed a quick smile and nodded her head.

~Meanwhile~

The Xenosaga crew was observing the Foundation (It was the first time for most of them.) when a realian suddenly called for Jr. "Little Master! A distress call was just sent to us from a ship called Pink Hana. They said they were being pursued by a U-Tic ship and were headed toward here, and that they need reinforcements!" She told this to Jr. quickly, knowing it was important. "U-Tic again? Man, they just won't give up!" Jr. told the realian to tell the ship that they would be waiting for them and would take down the U-Tic ship when they got a clear enough shot. "But I wonder why U-Tic is after that ship?" He wondered aloud to himself.

~Back To Miko And Nobu~

"Take that, you dumb U-Tic people!" I yell as I shoot at the ship that was still pursuing us. I don't know whats so important about me that they would pursue us this far. But they sure are annoying! My eyes widen as I realize that they are about to fire their canon. "Nobu! Put the shields at their strongest and go faster! That ship is going to fire its canon! Make a sharp turn to the right when I tell you to! Got it?" I said quickly and loudly. "Yes Ma'am! Be careful, okay? If you get hurt while we're turning, don't complain about going to the hospital!" I grinned. "When am I not careful?" "That's what I'm scared of." Nobu sounded kind of nervous. What did I expect? I'm almost never careful. Hehe, that's what happens when you deal with stuff that could blow up for a living!

"Now!" I yelled to Nobu. All of a sudden the ship jerked to the right and my head smacked up against the wall. "Crap! That hurt so bad! Wait…Ah, sucka no! I'm bleeding!" I started to freak out a little. If the wound was bad enough, Nobu would take me to the…Hospital. My vision blurred a bit. "Ma'am! Are you alright?" "Of course I am! Now, how far till we're at the foundation?" "Actually, we're there now. And there is the ship that's supposed to take down that U-Tic ship for us." I gawked at the image of the ship that popped up. "The Durandal!? Who exactly is helping us?!" "That would be me." A red headed boy was grinning at me now. "Ma'am, it appears we were lucky enough to contact Gaignun Kukai Jr., or Little Master, as back up. Who knew that lucky charm would work!" Nobu's face popped up next to Jr.'s. She is referring to a necklace I got her for her birthday. It's supposed to bring good luck. "Wait a minute! You're bleeding! You weren't careful like I told you to be!" "Nobu, I'm your boss. If I get hurt, you're supposed to ask me if I'm all right. Not get on to me! Besides, it's just a small head wound. Nothing to worry about." "How about I just have one of my friends heal that for you? It's quick, easy, and painless." The blue-eyed boy suggested to me. That was some good news! "Okay! Thanks a bunch! Oh and Nobu?" "Yes Ma'am?" "Remind me to not leave you with the job of picking a ship out." "Yes Ma'am." She said with a disappointed voice while Jr. snickered.

I stumbled along the hallway to the head of the ship. My vision was getting more blurry by the second and I was having trouble keeping my balance. I finally made it to the head of the ship and Nobu rushed to my aid as soon as she saw me. "Hop on Ma'am. That way it'll be easier to get down the steps." "I'm fine Nobu. Besides, an owner of a big, important company like me can't look weak in front of anyone, especially Gaignun Kukai Jr, now can I?" Nobu sighed at me and my pride. "I suppose not. But I have a bad feeling about you walking on your own." "What is it with you and your fee- Ahhhh!" Durring our conversation, we had landed in the hangar (What do you call the place where the Durandal and Elsa let ships land? I can't remember what it's called. If you know, please tell me!), and we had been about to walk down the steps when Nobu wanted me to get on her back. While I was questioning her feelings, I managed to fall off the steps. I had only stepped down once before I slipped. Once! And now I was falling. Great!

I was falling and my head wound had disoriented me too much for me to prevent myself from getting hurt. My black hair and silver bangs whipped around and in front of my face. I closed my big, blue eyes, not wanting to see my assistant's worried face. I waited and waited, but the pain of hitting the floor never came. I felt someone's arms holding me. I slowly opened my eyes to see a pair of blue orbs staring right back at mine. I realized it was Little Mas- I mean Jr. I felt my face heat up. "Um, thanks for catching me." He was blushing too, but I was too oblivious to notice that at the moment. "Y- You're welcome. I'll just set you down now." He set me down, careful to not let me fall. "MA'AAAAAAAAMM!" I was suddenly scooped into the arms of a certain tall blonde headed, chocolate eyed, person. "Are you alright? I'm sorry! You fell so suddenly; I didn't have time to react! I'm such a bad assistant! You should just fire-" "Whoa, whoa, Nobu! You may be a little ditzy sometimes, but you're the best dang assistant there is, and I'm not about to fire you! Now, Nobu put me down please." "Yes Ma'am. Thank you Ma'am. I feel better now." I just smiled warmly at her and said "I'm just surprised you got down here so fast without tripping over your freakishly long legs." "That's not nice Ma'am!" She whined and I just snickered. "But you're so fun to tease!"

"Ahem." I then noticed the other people who were in the room. A brunette with glasses, another brunette (a man) who had blue eyes, a boy with silver hair, a tall man with blonde hair that was slicked back, and a girl with pink hair…Oh my gosh! Is that…? "MOMO?" I asked the pink haired girl. "Yes, but how did you…?" "MOMO! I can't believe it! Its me, Miko!" I ran over to her and hugged her tightly. "Miko! It's so nice to see you again! How have you been?" "Great! Well, except for this scratch, but its nothing really!" I told the 14-year-old realian (She should be about 14 right? Since she was born during the Miltian Conflict. If I'm wrong, please tell me.). "Oh! What happened? Here, I'll heal it." She used Medica on my head wound and it was aaaaaaaall better. "Hehe thanks! What happened was that when Nobu, my assistant, made that sharp turn, I banged my head against the wall. It hurt like the dickens! By the way, did you blow up that U-Tic ship already?" "We blew it up after you did that turn." Jr. informed me. "Oh." I laughed nervously; I was kind of embarrassed about not noticing.

"So, who are you exactly?" Jr. asked me, suspicion clear in his voice. I had learned the names of everyone in the room. There was Ziggy, Shion, Alan, KOS-MOS, and chaos. "Hehe, I was wondering when you'd ask." I grinned playfully. "I'm the one and only Miko Komatsu, the proud owner of Komatsu Bing Ba Da Boom Industries! And this is Nobu Yanamoko, my 56th assistant. Who, by the way, is freakishly tall! I mean, really! Look at her legs!" I said while pointing at Nobu's legs. They really were quite long. "Ma'aaaaaaaam! That's so mean!" "What? You want me to lower your salary? Okay! More funds for my Guns department!" "I'm sorry Ma'am!" "That's what I thought." I smirked. "56th! Why in the world have you had 55 assistants before her!?" Shion, Alan, and Jr. all said/yelled in unison. "Well, I'm a little picky with assistants. Plus, most of them were a bit wacky. Don't get me started on Samson! Man, that blondie was crazy!" I shivered at the thought of seeing him again. He creeped me out a lot! "Ma'am has a lot of bad memories about him. So she doesn't like to- Ma'am!" I was falling. I was so dizzy. I waited for the floor, but it never came. Once again, I was staring into big blue orbs. Then I blacked out.

~Jr.'s P.O.V.~

"Miko!" MOMO yelled out in concern at the same time Nobu yelled "Ma'am!" KOS-MOS walked over to where I was holding Miko. KOS-MOS put her hand on Miko's head for a moment and then spoke. " Calculation is complete. Miko has collapsed due to blood loss and exhaustion. It is recommended that she is taken to a doctor and that she should rest." (Did I get KOS-MOS right?) "Thank you KOS-MOS. Do you have a nurse on the Durandal?" Shion asked me and I grinned sheepishly. "Well… We have people who know medica and that's about it. Sorry, but if Miko needs a doctor, she'll have to wait until we land." I said with a `I'm really sorry` sound in my voice. Even though I should have been thinking about Miko's health, I couldn't help but wonder why U-Tic was after her. I also kept wondering how she knew MOMO. I looked at the girl in my arms. "What does U-Tic want from you? You're only 12, and the only thing you could help them with is their weaponry. And even then, you wouldn't be very useful because it isn't you who makes the weapons. Its all those scientists that work for you." I thought to myself.

"She doesn't need a doctor! All she needs is rest, food, some good music, and a book and she'll be fine! This happens a lot, and she usually just needs some rest." Nobu's words broke me out of my thoughts. "Well, does the Durandal have any extra rooms? If not, then who's room will she stay in?" chaos (Yes! He finally gets to talk!) brought this small problem to our attention. "I think we do. I'll go check with Mary and Shelley." "I'll hold Ma'am while you do that Little Master. I'm sure you don't want any extra weight on you." Nobu smiled politely at me and I grinned back. "Thanks Nobu!" "No problem Little Master." "Rubedo…Thanks for… friend." My eyes widened at this. Did Miko just mutter my old name in her sleep? I think she did!

"Rubedo? She's always muttering in her sleep about someone named Rubedo. She says she thinks he's someone from her past that she can't remember. But I think that she just finally got interested in guys and is imagining her dream guy." "Didn't I tell you to respect your elders?! And don't go blurting out things that are unnecessary! And he is real! I just know it! Oh, and I'm not giving you a bonus because of that little `Dream Guy` comment!" "Huh?! I thought you were asleep!" "I was until I was put in your arms! I can't trust you not to say embarrassing stuff like `Oh, your so cute when your asleep!` or something to that effect! Who was holding me before? I liked it better when they held me." Miko seemed to say the last two sentences to herself, but I heard her. I felt my face heat up. Isn't she 12? Why am I blushing over the fact that a 12 year old likes me holding them? Weird. And also, how could she have known me when I had the name Rubedo? I haven't gone by that name in 14 years! And she's only 12! (By the way, Jr. knows [or thinks…hehe] she's 12 because the owner of Komatsu Industries is supposed to be 12. He never actually got a picture of her or anything [for the profile Gaignun sent him], he just heard of her.) This is getting confusing! "Hey, you okay Jr.? You seem to be deep in thought and your face is red. Are you sick or something?" Miko asked me with concern showing in her voice (though no one else noticed. It was kind of hard to tell.). "Huh? Oh yeah, I'm fine. And its just a little hot in here, that's all." I laughed a bit nervously. "Okay. Um, you fight with guns, right?" "Yeah. Why?" Miko grinned at me with an excited look in her eyes.

In my hands were two guns. Well, laser guns, but it was in the same category. They were silver with a blue trigger and handle. In blue letters, the word (and number) `Version 3` was engraved in the gun in cursive. Miko was leaning against Nobu for support and was grinning. "Since you fight with guns, I thought you might like to try out my newest guns. Frost Bite Version 3 is the name it goes by. The 1st two were failures. This one is going to be a success for sure though! I can feel it!" She grinned even wider (if possible) and then yawned. "I better rest soon or I'm going to faint again." "Oh, yeah! Lets go see Marry (is that how its spelled? I can't remember.) and ask her about rooms." chaos (he spoke again! Yay! Though, I need to let Ziggy speak too…) reminded us. I have a feeling that something is going to go wrong…Its probably nothing.

Oh, how wrong I was.

Rey: Hehe, Jr. you're in for a surprise next chapter!

Jr: Eh? This isn't the Durandal! How did I get here?!

Miko: Thats because Rey ordered me and Nobu to kidnap you.

Nobu: Sorry Little Master!

Jr: Its okay Nobu, I don't blame you. I do blame Miko and Rey though!

Miko: I can't help it if Rey orders me to do something!

Jr: Threaten her with your guns!

Miko: She'll just threaten to erase me from her memory and this story too...I can't have that happen!

Rey: Yep, ya can't 'cause you have to regain your memory and remember your love with J- *suddenly has a sock stuffed in her mouth and knocked out*

Nobu: Baka! She can't know yet! Sheesh...Oops. Did I knock her out?

Jr: Yep.

Miko: Oh well.

Everyone but Rey: Bye! And enjoy 'The Memories I've Lost, And Want Back'!

Review please! Tips are greatly appreciated! And remember flames must be reasonable! Unreasonable ones will be used to boil eggs and to cook hash browns for breakfast. Adieu~!


	2. Strange Voices and Memories

A/N: Hey everybody! Sorry about the long wait; I've had writer's block for the longest time and then my stupid school kept piling up the homework and projects. :( Hopefully, this will make up for my long absence. It has some interesting stuff...Hehe. ;)

* * *

~Miko's P.O.V.~

Despite my protests, Nobu carried me to the head of the ship. Man, I hate looking weak in front of people I don't know well…Okay; I hate looking weak in front of anybody really.

"Nobu~! I'm fine! I can walk on my own!" I whined quietly to my assistant.

Nobu ignored me and continued to walk, following Jr.

"Nobu, if you don't let me down, I will make you clean _all _of my guns, _including_ the heavy-duty guns. And I'll double your paper work!"

I was now annoyed to no end. Nobu retaliated by saying,

"Remember when I tried to clean your guns last time Ma'am? _That _didn't turn out too well. And I don't mind more paper work-I usually have to do your paper work anyways."

Nobu smiled (a bit evilly if you ask me) at me and continued walking. Dang it! I just _had _to have a smart assistant! I pouted and gave her the silent treatment all the way to our destination.

We finally reached the front of the ship and Nobu set me down. She stretched some and so did I. I started to walk away, ignoring the exhaustion and dizziness, when Nobu scooped me up in her arms, bridal style. I glared at her and she grinned in return. Darn her.

"Mary, how many rooms do we have left?"

Jr.'s voice shook me out of my mean thoughts and I directed my attention towards this 'Mary' person. She was blonde and rather tall. She reminds me of Nobu…

"Sorry Little Master, but we don't have any left. Your friends took up the last ones. Our new guests are gonna have to share with someone."

Mary looked over to where Nobu and I were. I was currently arguing with Nobu about how I could/couldn't walk on my own, and had managed to get out of her grasp. Mary seemed to realize who I was, because she looked over at Jr. and said,

"Why didn't you tell me Miko Komatsu was our new guest?"

She seemed to think about something for a bit before smiling and announcing what she thought.

" Hmmm, I think because she is the owner of her own company, that she should get your room Little Master!"

What?! I can't share a room with a guy, even if he is just a kid! That'd be awkward! Noticing his expression and mine, she quickly added, "It's just a suggestion!" I wouldn't mind sharing a room with Jr., if it wasn't for the fact that he was a _guy _and it was _his _room. Of course, he _is_ just a kid. But I would feel like I was intruding if I did. I looked over to Jr. who seemed deep in thought. He let out a sigh and finally said something.

"I guess she can stay in my room. It's up to Miko if she wants to though."

Everyone looked to me and I started to think. Well, I would feel bad if I did…wait! He fights with and probably collects guns! Which means, there should be some in his room! I suddenly grinned, thinking of all the guns to look at and how I would be able to make good conversation since we both liked guns. Everyone noticed my dreamy expression, and before they got the wrong idea, I put on a silly serious face.

"I suppose I could share his room…But do you have any guns in your room, Jr.?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Well, heh heh…"

I grinned, embarrassed. I mean, I'm not trigger-happy or anything, I just really love guns! They're really fascinating to me. But most people would probably think I'm trigger-happy. He looked confused for a second before realizing why I asked, and grinned broadly.

"I see. Well, when you're feeling better, you can check them out, okay?"

"Thanks! Whoa…"

My head hurt for a moment and suddenly, I was seeing…a memory?

_I looked around at where I was, to see I was in some sort of room. It looked like a bedroom. There was a bed in one corner of the room, and a desk in another. There was a window, so I looked out of it to see a small garden area below the room I was in. Where was I? This place seems so familiar…_

_I heard the door open, and my head snapped toward it. Four people walked into the room. Three of them were boys, while the last one was a girl. My eyes widened in surprise to see that the girl was me! But instead of long black hair with silver bangs that framed my face, I had short black hair that stopped right above my shoulders, and normal black bangs that hung slightly over my eyes. I realized this must be a memory from my past, from when I was still known as Yuki Kenichi. _

"_Sorry guys, but I just don't feel all that great. I think I must've caught something from being out in the rain last night."_

_I heard my past self speak apologetically to the three boys. I looked at the three boys to see that I couldn't make out their faces. Like always in my flash backs, their faces were blurred and I could only make out their hair color. One had silver hair, one had black hair, and the last one had red hair. The red-haired boy (who I realized to be Rubedo, from my other dreams) spoke to me and I listened intently to what he said, feeling as if I had heard his voice before._

"_I see. Well, when you're feeling better, we'll check them out, okay?"_

"_Sounds good! Thanks, you guys! And sorry again for not being able to check out the books with you."_

"_Don't worry about it. They'll be there tomorrow."_

_The black-haired boy spoke (who I also realized to be Nigredo), making my younger self feel better about not accompanying them. She smiled softly at the boys before saying goodbye to them and lying down on the bed after they left. I watched as my twelve-year-old self fell asleep. Soon after, the image blurred until I was standing back with the Nobu and the others._

"…ko?"

What was that all about? And Rubedo's voice sounded so familiar…

"…iko!"

And where was I? I remember working with the government for a while before the Miltian Conflict, but I just can't remember where I was sent to, or whom I worked with!

"Miko!"

I broke out of my trance, realizing the concerned looks on everyone's faces. Jr. had been calling my name and also had a concerned look on his face. I smiled sheepishly, apologizing for not answering.

"Sorry, I was just…remembering something, I guess."

"Okay… Well, come on! I'll show ya to our room."

He grinned, grabbed my hand, and led me away from the others. Nobu was about to follow us when Mary told her to go with MOMO to look at the room they'd be sharing. Sometimes, Nobu reminded me of a mother who was overprotective of their child. Though, I'm older than her, so I guess I should be the overprotective mother, which I sometimes am. But I've learned to let Nobu do things her own way.

* * *

Jr. continued to lead me to his room until we arrived at our destination. He opened the door and I looked around. It was pretty normal. It had a bed, a bookshelf, a desk, and a bathroom. There was also a bedside table with a lamp. All in all, it looked like a typical room.

"So, what d'you think?"

"It's really nice! It kind of reminds me of the room I use to have at my grandmother's house."

"Oh, so my room reminds you of an old lady's room? That's _really _nice to say!"

"Oh! No, that's not what I mean! I meant, it just brings back old memories, ya know?"

I looked back to Jr. to see him grinning, which made me realize he had only been teasing me. I smiled a genuine smile, laughing a bit. I hadn't been teased like that for quite some time.

"How about you get some rest? When you're done resting, just ask one of the realians, and they'll lead you to where the others and I are."

"M'kay. Oh, and Jr.?"

He turned his head back to me as he opened the door.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for letting me stay here, and for saving Nobu and me from U-Tic."

"No problem!"

He grinned once more, before leaving me to rest. I sighed, flopping myself on the bed, so that my legs hung off the side. Jr. actually seemed a bit familiar, like I had met him before. But when have I met him, if I have? I think this is the first time I've ever met someone part of the Foundation. After I met him, and I passed out, I had a flashback again. I thought back to the memory, concentrating really hard.

_I was sitting on my bed with Rubedo beside me. We seemed to just sit in silence, enjoying each other's company. I turned my head toward Rubedo, still not able to see anything but a blur for his face. _

"_Rubedo?"_

"_Yeah?"_

_He turned his head toward me and looked curiously at me. I seemed to look into his eyes before smiling warmly._

"_Thanks for being my friend."_

Feeling a bit confused, I took off my white sneakers. Before lying down again, I also slipped my white jacket off (which, when I wore it, fell to my knees when I stoop up), revealing my black tank top underneath it. I then proceeded to lie down and closed my eyes. Some sleep would definetly do me some good.

Too bad I never was able to fall asleep. I decided to just use medica on myself, and go to where the others were. I sat up and put my sneakers back on. After tieing my shoes, I stoop up and concentrated on my Ether. This would be my first time using medica, because I had never taken the time to learn support spells. That was Nobu's job. The spell seemed to work, because I felt better right away. I sighed in content before grabbing my jacket and putting it on, not bothering to zip it up this time. I felt a little warm, after all.

* * *

As I made my way down the hall, I kept a look out for a realian that could show me to where everyone else was. Where the Heck is a realian when you need one?

"_I see you have finally met back up with Rubedo, ma neige."_

I came to an abrupt halt. Confused, I looked around at my surroundings. No one is here, so who said that? And that voice…it kind of scared me.

"_Why, it was me who spoke. Do you not remember the mental link you share with Rubedo, Nigredo, and I?"_

Wait, Rubedo, Nigredo? The boys from my memories? And what mental link? Is that how this guy is speaking to me? What the Hell is going on?!

"_Why so surprised, ma neige? Is it really that shocking to hear from me after so many years?"_

"_Who are you? How do you know Rubedo and Nigredo?"_

I was careful not to portray my feelings in my words. I had no idea who this guy was, so I had to be careful about what I say, and how I say it.

"_It seems that what I was told is true, you really _can't _remember much about your past with the U.R.T.V.s."_

U.R.T.V.s? That sounds so familiar…

"_It sounds familiar because you use to work with us, ma neige."_

"_Stop doing that!"_

"_Doing what, ma neige?"_

"_Reading my mind!"_

The voice let out a laugh that sent shivers down my back. It sounded a bit insane.

"_I'm not reading your mind, I'm hearing your thoughts. You must try to be careful if you don't want me to hear your thoughts, ma neige."_

"_You still haven't answered my question. Who are you and how do you know Rubedo and Nigredo?"_

"_I'm afraid I can't reveal myself just yet, ma neige. But don't worry, I'll be seeing you soon."_

"_Wait!"_

I waited for an answer from the mysterious man, but received none. I sighed in frustration, and began making my way down the hall again. Who _was_ that? And what did he mean by, "I'll be seeing you soon?" Feeling very creeped out, I finally came upon a realian that kindly escorted me to where Jr. and the others were waiting.

* * *

"Wow! Is that the Foundation?"

I rushed excitedly to the big window when I came into the room. I heard someone chuckle at me as they came to stand next to me. I looked up to see Shion. She smiled at me and I smiled back before looking at the Foundation again. It was really amazing! It looked like they had a beach too! Just as I was about to call Nobu over (who I noticed speaking with MOMO), I heard the door I had previously come through open. I turned towards the noise to see a man around his early to mid twenties, I'm guessing, with black hair and emerald green eyes. Our eyes locked for a moment before he walked over to MOMO. He talked to her about something, which seemed to disapoint her. Taking this as my que to step in and cheer her up by being my wacky self, I ran to Nobu, tackling her in a hug from behind that almost knocked her over.

"Hey Nobu~! Hey MOMO, how are you guys doing?"

"Ma'am, what are you doing up already? Shouldn't you be in bed?"

She gave me that stern look that she only gave me when I got hurt. I hated that look! It made me feel like I was twelve again and was being scolded by my mother.

"I'm fine! Besides, I couldn't sleep. Hey MOMO, why the long face?"

"Oh, I'm okay. Mommy is just busy again…"

She trailed off, and I realized why she had looked so disappointed. She had wanted to speak to Juli Mizrahi, but couldn't because the doctor was 'busy.' I gave her a sympathetic look before giving her a noogie.

"What did I tell you about getting all sad? I said, 'you're not allowed to be sad, 'cause than I'll get sad too,' right? Besides, you don't look cute when you're sad! How do you expect to impress boys with a sad face?"

"Sorry, I won't be sad anymore! And I'm not trying to impress any boys…"

MOMO lightly blushed at my words, smiling at me. I grinned back, knowing my plan had worked. I stopped giving her a noogie and fixed her hair so it didn't look so messy. I noticed I was being watched; so I turned around to find emerald eyes staring at my water blue ones. They had a fond look in them. I grinned before bowing.

"Nice to meet you sir! I'm Miko Komatsu."

"So I've heard. It's nice to meet you as well. I'm Gaignun Kukai."

"Wow! Really? I must say, I'm really impressed with the Foundation; I haven't seen something so beautiful in years!"

I grinned at the man that towered over me (which, I suppose, isn't too hard to do…), who also looked a bit familiar. What is it with people seeming familiar lately? I feel like I've seen that black hair before…

"Thank you, but I'm sure you've seen better. You travel a lot, don't you?"

"Well, yeah, but they never seem to be able to pull off a beautiful scene that feels comfortable, like home. It might be too early to say, but I can tell it'll feel like home. You've done a good job, Mr. Kukai."

"Thanks, and you can call me Gaignun."

"Oh, okay. Then you can call me Miko!"

I smiled again at Gaignun and I got the same familiar feeling from him as he smiled back. I swear; I just know I've met him and Jr. before! This is kind of confusing though, trying to figure out where I've seen people and where I've met them. And Gaignun had a look in his eyes. A look that said he knew something about me, or at least he knew more than he let on. He had a look in his eyes that showed he _knew _we had met before. And that confused me the most.

* * *

As I stared out the window, deep in thought, Gaignun bid his farewells. I didn't notice he had left until I saw a hand waving in front of my face and heard my name being called.

"Hey, Miko, you okay? You didn't answer my question."

"Huh? Oh, sorry. I was just thinking about some stuff, no biggie. What's your question?"

I looked to Jr. to have my blue orbs meet with his, dead on. And as I looked into those orbs, I couldn't help but feel I had stared into them before. That's how we stayed for a few seconds before I looked away, finding the floor quite interesting now.

"I was asking if you felt alright? It doesn't seem like you were resting all that long."

"I feel pretty good. I used medica on myself before coming to join you guys."

I reassuringly smiled at the red head who grinned in return.

"Didn't want to miss anything, huh?"

"You bet!"

I felt arms scoop me up for the hundreth time that day, causing me to squirm and complain. Of course, it was Nobu who had picked me up and she looked amused as I wiggled like a worm in her arms, trying to get her to let go.

"You're resting whether you like it or not!"

"But I feel fine!"

I pouted as Nobu asked Jr. where his room was. Why does she always do that? When I say I'm fine, I'm fine! Jr. laughed at my sour expression and had one of the realians escort us to his room, since he had to go talk to Gaignun. I gave Nobu the silent treatment the whole way, giving her a scowl or two, though she just smiled back. As soon as the realian left and we were in Jr.'s room, Nobu's expression changed to a serious one. I thought she was going to scold me, but what she said really surprised me.

"You remembered something, didn't you?"

I stared at the honey-haired woman in surprise as I tried to gather words. I knew she was observant, but never this observant!

"Yeah, a bunch actually. I had some flashbacks."

"Did they involve those boys again?"

"Yeah."

Nobu smiled at me. "Well, that's really good, right? I mean, the more you remember, the more likely you can find them and ask them about your past, right?"

I smiled and nodded at her. Though, I'm still puzzled as to why Jr. and Gaignun seem so familiar. And who was that voice? He talked about Rubedo and Nigredo, and how I had a mental link with them and him. A thought suddenly popped into my head; what if the voice was Albedo? It might be, since the voice never mentioned Albedo. The again, there could have been another member to our little group and Albedo was excluded from the mental link. The voice could be anyone.

"_Thinking hard about me, ma neige?"_

My eyes widened and I looked to Nobu who had occupied herself with the books on the bookshelf. She was probably trying to find a good book to read. Placing a pouty face on, I told Nobu that if she really wanted me to rest more, I would. She smiled thankfully to me and left me to rest. My expression became serious as soon as she left the room, scowling in concentration.

"_You bet. After that mysterious conversation, my mind has been going haywire. And if I can use my mental link with you, why can't I use it with Rubedo and Nigredo?"_

"_I never said you couldn't. Though, it may be hard for you to use the link, since both Rubedo and Nigredo believe you to be dead, therefore weakening the link."_

I stopped breathing as he spoke those words. They believed me to be dead? Why? Why would they…

"_Yuki! Come on!"_

_Rubedo yelled to me as I fought off another corrupt realian, panting. My left arm was bleeding badly, and I was struggling to resist corruption by the Song of Nephilim, but I wouldn't give up. Not now._

"_Go on, Rubedo. I'll be fine."_

_I shot down the last realian before turning around to look at Rubedo, and was shocked to see blue orbs staring into my own. The rest of his face was blurred, but I could clearly see his blue eyes that were full of worry and guilt. _

"_I can't just leave you behind! You're injured badly and-"_

"_Yeah, but Nigredo is injured even worse. You're going to have to leave me behind because I'd only slow you down more. And if I stay behind, I can hold off the realians for a while."_

_Rubedo's eyes began to tear up, not wanting to leave me behind. He blinked, rubbed his eyes and walked to where I was standing. I gave him a stern look that warned him not to drag me with him, but I realized he looked defeated, and like he was going to trust me._

"_You better make it out of Miltia alive!"_

_He whispered in my ear as he hugged me tightly, not wanting to leave me all alone. I smiled and placed a kiss on his cheek and slipped something into his pocket without his notice._

"_I will, promise. Now go! More of them are coming."_

_Rubedo let go of me, grabbed Nigredo, and began to run. I took a deep breath and began shooting relentlessly at the realians I had once been allied with, killing most within the first couple of shots. However, I didn't notice one of them come from behind. I didn't even hear the realian. So when I felt the bullets pierce me from behind, I was shocked and fell to the ground, not reacting quickly enough. I'm guessing Rubedo had turned around to make sure I was doing okay, because the next thing I heard was him shouting my name._

"_YUKI!"_

_I stumbled as I struggled to get up and turned my head toward Rubedo, clutching my guns tightly. His eyes showed fury and worry, and I knew what he was thinking._

"_Get out of here now!"_

_Rubedo made a move to lay Nigredo down, but I shot my guns with perfect accuracy at his feet, despite my condition, and gave him a stern look. _

"_Don't even think about it! Get Nigredo out of here, now! I'll be fine!"_

_Rubedo didn't look convinced._

"…_I promised, remember? Now please, go." I barely whispered loud enough for him to hear me before I began to shoot the realians once more. I heard Rubedo's steps growing fainter and fainter, until I could hear them no more. The realians were beginning to out number me, and I was becoming more frantic. I decided to use my last resort._

I breathed heavily as the flashback played in my mind, over and over again. The exhaustion that claimed my body after the memory was enormous, but I refused to lay down on the bed and fall asleep. Mulling over the memory, I now knew why they thought I was dead; I had them leave me in a hopeless situation that no one could have survived in. I did survive, but they had no idea. Now the question is, why don't they know I'm alive?

"_Ah, ma neige, you remember that inccident? It seems as though just the small encounters you've had with Rubedo, Nigredo, and I have triggered your memory. How splendid!"_

The voice laughed insanely, causing me to involuntarily shiver. I really need to learn to keep my thoughts to myself…

"_Wait! What encounters? I haven't seen or heard from Rubedo and Nigredo since that day!"_

"_You don't recognize them? Tsk, tsk, ma neige. I can understand not recognizing Nigredo, he's grown quite a bit, but dear Rubedo looks exactly the same."_

"_Well, sorry, I mean, I've only _lost_ my memory is all!"_

"_Still short tempered, I see."_

I scowled at this comment and took off my coat and lay down on the bed.

"_I'll leave you be for now, ma neige. You'll need your strength later on. I bid you adieu."_

I gladly let the voice leave, thoroughly upset now. Not just about the 'short tempered' comment, but also about the fact Rubedo and Nigredo thought I was dead. To have to bear the burden of a close friend's death for so long…I don't know how they deal with it. Knowing Rubedo, he probably blames himself for the whole thing, and I can't have that! I began to concentrate really hard, thinking of no one but Rubedo, trying my hardest to remember his face. I could only remember his eyes, the beautiful pools of water I had gazed into more than once in my childhood. I hoped even without remembering his face, I could still use the mental link.

"…_Rubedo? You there? …I guess not."_

I sighed in dissapointment and buried my face in Jr.'s pillow, the soft fabric caressing my face. I refused to let any tears come, no matter how sad I was. I had to stay positive! I would keep trying to talk to him using the mental link until I got a response. Fatigue finally consumed me, and I drifted off into a sleep filled with memories, old and recent, happy and sad. If only I had stayed awake a little longer, I may have heard the response I had so desperately wanted to hear.

"_Yuki…?" _

Ma Neige- My Snow

A/N: Sorry that there isn't much action or romance in this one! I'm trying to add in some background and give more insight as to what is going on with Miko. I really hope you enjoyed this chapter, and I promise I'll try to update soon. I may put my stories on hold for a bit though, at least until Christmas break.

TEAR


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